Elphaba's Diary

[popularinpink]

*pouts for a second and then smiles kind of like this ;D*

Okay, okay..... WRITE ANOTHER ENTRY!!!!!!

[imperfectly_green]

6th Entry

I have really strange news, and even I’m still not sure of what happened. But I guess I should start from the beginning again, because otherwise nothing will make sense.

I went to the party. Perhaps it was Galinda’s complements that actually compelled me to go, or maybe I was curious as to what a party would be like, or maybe just for that same old reason, to look after Nessa. But I went, all the same.

When I arrived (about an hour late), wearing the hat Galinda gave me, everything stopped. The music stopped, people stopped dancing, and everyone stared at me. I’d swear that the room became several degrees colder. Under the pressure of those frosty glares, I wanted to run away as fast as I could. But, no, I thought, if you run, they’ll just laugh. Then where will you be, Elphaba? And besides, what’s to lose?

With a glare at Galinda, who, clutching her new training wand, looked absolutely mortified, I walked out to the center of the dance floor. I have absolutely no idea how to dance, and because there was no music going I couldn’t make anything up. So I did what I knew how to do; I pretended I was casting a spell and made smooth, flowing arm movements and sways. Still, no one moved a muscle.

After a while, I guess Galinda’s guilt got the better of her. She left her date, walked up to me and said “Excuse me…” I stopped dancing and studied her. She seemed genuinely sorry, but frankly…I couldn’t trust her, now, could I? “May I cut in?” she asked. I said nothing. She began imitating my movements, the arms, the swaying, to the point of perfection. Is it any surprise that I resumed the dance as well? I’m only human. I had my chance to fit in, and I took it. To my surprise the music started back up again and everyone joined in. Galinda just…has that influence on people.

And I think, at that moment, something…something of grew up between the two of us. I still didn’t entirely trust Galinda, but there was definitely some kind of twisted tie between us two. I did her a favor, and she repaid me, but there was something more. Some sort of…companionship. It was a new feeling. I looked at Galinda, “dancing” opposite me, and she looked so silly that I just had to smile. I’m pretty sure that she did too.

After we had been dancing for a few minutes, Galinda took my arm—yes, she actually dared to touch me—and pulled me over to her date. I assumed this must be the oh-so-scandalacious Fiyero. From experience, I know that people can’t, and shouldn’t, be judged by appearances, but that was what I (and probably most people, for that matter) first noticed about Fiyero Tiggular, that he was strikingly good-looking. Like I said, I’m only human.

So Galinda dragged me over to meet him. “Fiyero,” she said, “this is my roommate, Miss Elphaba. And, uh, vice-versa,” she concluded, with one of her usual hair-flips and a smile for Fiyero.

Fiyero looked me over, from strange pointed hat to combat boots, and gave a “nice to meet you.” He held out his hand.

I didn’t look him over. I just stared at his hand awkwardly. No one—no one—offers to shake my hand, ever. I usually offer my hand, whoever I’m talking to stares at it in all its greenness, and I’m left to drop it and try to move on. Needless to say, I shook his hand. So many new opportunities tonight. “Charmed,” I said.

“Well, now that that’s over, who’s up for punch? Lemons and melons and pears tonight!” Galinda said, relieved that the two of us actually seemed to get along. Surprisingly, we stuck together and went to get our refreshments in our own little group—the Popular Girl, the Handsome Guy, and the Green Bean. In fact, Galinda wouldn’t let me far out of her sight for the rest of the evening. I think she was afraid I would embarrass myself if I was left to my own devices. Or maybe that if we got separated people could come up and ask her “Why are you hanging out with that weirdo?” But this actually worked out to my benefit: people didn’t shrink away from me. A couple of them even spoke to me. For once the attention I was getting wasn’t negative. And it felt good.

I’m writing this on the carriage ride home. Galinda’s still here. I thought she’d go back with Fiyero, but no. So far any conversation we’ve had has been a little awkward. I mean, what she did for me was great, but did she really mean something or was it just done out of pity? Or was this a trap, to lower my guard then set me up for another trick? I don’t think she knows exactly what to make of me either.

The current scene:

Galinda sits delicately, with legs crossed, opposite me in the carriage. She fingers her training wand, as if it will disappear, then gives a few experimental swishes. I alternate between scribbling in my journal and staring out the window. It’s a clear night, not a cloud in the sky, and warm. It’s so quiet that the only sound heard is the clip clop, clip clop, clip clop, clip clop, of the horses’ hooves. I’m counting the stars to the beat as Galinda asks, “Do you bring that with you everywhere you go?”

She means the journal. “No,” I reply. I grip it a little more tightly, just in case she asks to see it.

She doesn’t. “Oh,” she says. She fingers a blond curl tentatively. “What do you think of Fiyero?”

I shrug. “He seems nice.”

“Yeah…” She seems drift off into space. Then, “He’s a really good kisser, too.”

Did not need to know that. Do not even want to know how she knows that.

More later,
Elphaba

[imperfectly_green]

popularinpink said:

*pouts for a second and then smiles kind of like this ;D*

Okay, okay..... WRITE ANOTHER ENTRY!!!!!!

That good, Haley?

[stars in the sky]

dsr said:

“Yeah…” She seems drift off into space. Then, “He’s a really good kisser, too.”

Did not need to know that. Do not even want to know how she knows that.

You are totally my hero. Only recommendation-- it's a diary! Dig deeper than just narrating what we know happens

[imperfectly_green]

But of course! ;D There'll be more thoughts and feelings in the "Popular" entry.

[DancingElphie]

Yeah, much agreed with stars. A diary needs lots of inner thoughts, digging deep into the motivations of the main character, and possibly misjudging an event or person. Make her really think about something. Elphie would do that: and that's a main reason why she'd have this dairy: she needs some place to pour ot her thoughts. Otherwise, EXCELLENT!
DE

[imperfectly_green]

Thanks for all the criticism. ;D
~Dee

~~~~~

7th Entry

Where did I leave off? Oh, yes. After that little interlude, there wasn’t all that much said between us. But as we were walking back to the room, the tension snapped when Galinda asked, “So, how did you like the party?”

“It was alright,” I said as she turned the key. “It was my first party, and…”

Galinda looked at me for a second, then burst out in giggles. No, she was seriously howling with laughter. I didn’t exactly know how to react…was what I said really that funny? Perhaps she had had a little too much punch…“No kidding? Your very first party--ever!?”

“Do funerals count?”

She kept on laughing. “Your very first party!” She gained control again, but the whole mood, the two us just talking, had changed to something like that of one of those fabled sleepovers which I had never had. “Oh, I know! Let's tell each other something we've never told anyone... I'll go first: Fiyero and I are going to be married.” She gave a little squeal of excitement.

“Really?” I honestly didn’t care, but they had just met! “He’s asked you already?”

“No, he doesn’t know yet…Now, you tell me a secret.”

“Like what?” I looked her straight in the eyes. There was no trace of malice there now, only the twinkle of innocent fun and laughter. A secret? What could I say? That up until now I thought you were a stupid, shallow, blonde bitch who only cared about you and thought nothing about anyone else? That I never thought I would ever have this kind of conversation with someone like you? That I deeply loathed you, but I just found out that I never really knew you after all?

I always hated people who pre-judged people, because I was always the victim of their assumptions. I would tell Nessa how much I loathed them, and she would half-heartedly agree, always looking away as she said it. Now I know why. It’s a weird cycle, that, because I was prejudging the people who prejudged me in thinking that they were stupid or selfish or needed to be cruelly amused by picking on me. But Galinda, sitting across from me, didn’t seem all that or selfish or cruel, though she is a bit ditzy. She was human, normal. She’d just been put in an unfamiliar and somewhat uncomfortable situation by rooming with me, and had acted accordingly. But really, so had I, if that makes any sense. I’d never been able to see my antagonists like that before. But it was clear now, we had both been the victims of prejudgment.

“Elphie?!” Galinda asked, waving a hand in front of my face. “You still there? I blinked. I must’ve been staring off into space. “Tell me…like…why do you always sleep with this funny, little, green bottle under your pillow?” Before I could stop her, she grabbed the bottle from where I always kept it.

“Give that back!” I cried. If Galinda harmed it in any way…

“C’mon, tell me, tell me, tell me!” the blonde squealed.

“It was my mother’s!” I said, raising my voice almost to a shout. Galinda’s eyes grew very wide, and I looked away. “That’s all…” I muttered. And in truth, that was all. That bottle had belonged to my mother, but I didn’t know what significance it had had to her in real life. A present from Father, perhaps? A pretty little trinket that she had once purchased? Or maybe the container of an expensive drink she once bought, who could say? But still, that “funny, little, green bottle” is the only thing I have to remember my mother by.

She gently handed the bottle back to me. “It’s not fair. I told you a really good one.” The only emotion I heard in her voice was something that I could describe as juvenile indignation. And it occurred to me that maybe…maybe Galinda never grew up. A life of getting her way all of the time probably kept her from realizing that the world is not all cupcakes and ponies and rainbows served to her on a silver platter, that there is war, poverty, and disease out there and that, usually, there are not happily-ever-afters. But Galinda was spoiled, not ruined. I’m not saying that this was her fault in any way; she just needs to learn. So I decided to tell her my deepest secret.

“My father hates me—” I began. Galinda gasped. “No, that’s not the secret.” I revealed how Nessa came to be paralyzed, and how it was my fault. I was almost afraid of her reaction. This was the first person to think I wasn’t a freak of nature—would I scare her away with the truth?

Apparently my “truth” was not her “truth.” “But that was the milkflowers fault, not yours,” she assured me. “That may be your secret, Elphaba, but it doesn’t make it true.” At that moment, the pitch black of night changed to the pre-dawn twilight, and Galinda exclaimed, “Oh look, it’s tomorrow!” Then she turned back to me. “Elphie…do you mind if I call you ‘Elphie?’”

Elphie. In some way the nickname didn’t seem to fit me. “It’s a little…perky.”

Galinda continued on anyway. “And you can call me...Galinda. So...Elphie...now that we're friends, I've decided to make you my new project!”

Her new project? A nice offer, but…“You really don’t have to do that,” I protested.

Galinda shrugged daintily. “I know. That’s what makes me so nice!” Then she went on and on and on about why she was helping me and how popular I would be and the benefits of being popular—all while she put make-up on me, took off the hat, and unbraided my hair and brushed it out. I never even had time to say “but I don’t need to be popular.” Truth is, a part of me actually wanted to be normal for once. It's something I didn’t need, but…

“This is never going to work!” I exclaimed. As I thought about it, it seemed even more incredulous. Me? Popular?

“Oh Elphie, you mustn't think that way anymore! Your whole life is going to change... and all because of me. Okay, stand... I will turn your frock into a beautiful ball gown! Stand up…” I stood up. Galinda waved the wand. “Ball gown!” she commanded. I wanted to tell her that you had to have your feet only slightly apart, that you had to only do one up and down flick of the wrist with the wand instead of waving it around like that, and that the wand was really only a tool to get you to focus. But I let her try anyway. “Is this thing on?” she asked finally, tapping the wand against the bed in exasperation.

“Do you want me to try?” I offered.

“No, I've got it!” she said forcefully. She looked at the wand, and then threw it down, as if angry at it for not doing her bidding. “Oh, just wear the frock, it’s pretty! Now, I'll show you how to flip your hair…” She demonstrated, then had me follow her example. I’m afraid I need a tiny bit more practice with the hair-flip, but I got the general idea. Then, the finishing touch: a pink flower for my hair, because “pink goes good with green.” Galinda showed me my reflection in her pink compact mirror.

I’ll admit, I was nervous. I mean, give a freak make-up and she’s just a freak in make-up, right? But I looked—I hesitate to say pretty, but that’s actually how I looked. Pretty. Not Galinda’s kind of beauty—after all, I was still green—but for the first time I noticed how my hair fell around my face, how my eyes sparkled (Nessa always said they were my best feature, but I never believed her), how I wasn’t too thin or too fat…I’m not trying to be vain, it’s just for the first time I was comfortable with myself. I glanced at Galinda, who smiled, then back in the mirror. I was so surprised that I didn’t even thank Galinda, instead gave an “I…I have to go…” and ran outside, too, well, too startled to think.

After I collected my thoughts, I went back into the dorm room. Galinda was asleep on her bed. On mine was an outfit, a white blouse and black skirt that I forgot I even brought with me, and a note, straight and simple. “Wear these today—Galinda.”

How could I have been so wrong about Galinda? Do we really let first appearances affect judgment that much? I mean, if Galinda had also been green, but still Galinda-ish, would we have gotten along from the start instead of fighting for so long? But, then again, what of the constraints that society forced on Galinda that actually made her Galinda? Being so pretty and popular led people to believe that you were, as well, stupid and shallow. And that is what I believe happened to Galinda. She dumbed down to fit a stereotype, the Blonde Beauty/Bimbette. While I, so far outside of the norm, could do whatever the I felt like doing, and always seemed so tactless. But that didn’t matter, because people hated me because I was different and not a stereotype. Does that make any sense, imaginary reader (if you exist, of course)? Galinda, the prime stereotype, probably had to work to become one, while I, the anti-stereotype, was feared because I was so far from any definition of normal and could never possibly fit in. Until now.

I vow never to dumb down like Galinda most likely did. I won't let this new "popularity" go to my head. Nothing can or will change me like that. Nothing, and no one.

Elphaba

[emeraldroad]

This is really great! Post more soon!

[stars in the sky]

I second that!

[nessa_blue]

u r a great riter my friend. see at school 2marrow!!!!!!!! anyways it was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo good i loved it!!!!!!!!! so...good...cant...stop...putting...dots... sry. spazz attack. i LOVED IT rite more soon!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;D

[imperfectly_green]

Thanks guys! Questions? Comments? Suggestions (Suggestions are always valued)?

[karatekid]

starsinthesky said:

I second that!

And I third it! Just be sure to, as stars said before, do more than just tell what we know already happens. I loved when you created that salad-fight thing between Elphie and G(a)linda, it was something new, different, and hilarious! Keep the entries coming!

[imperfectly_green]

Hey guys,
I'm putting up a really short thing for now because I want to get as many of my thoughts down as I can before school ends and I leave for various and sundry camps. I promise, longer, more detailed entry later. But if you guys get the setting of this entry, brevity might be appropriate.
~Dee

~~~~~

8th Entry

I’ll have to be really brief for now, because we could get called in to see Morrible any minute. I’ll make a really short list and elaborate when I have time. I just don’t want to forget anything.

1) Dillamond’s been taken away. Something about Animals being no longer permitted to teach. Dillamond may have seemed a bit paranoid, but maybe he was right. His replacement is some nutty professor who thinks it’s alright to mistreat the Animals. He even brought a live demonstration today, and most of the students in class didn’t even have a problem with this. What kind of higher power would allow such a thing to happen? And what the hell is going on?

2) Fiyero and I in trouble for releasing the Lion cub which was being experimented upon in what was formerly Dr. Dillamond’s class. Which is why Morrible called for us in the first place. Heaven knows the kind of trouble we’ll be in—but I don’t care. We did the right thing. And if Morrible allows something like this kind of torture to happen, I might rather be expelled from Shiz. Though when I meet the Wizard, I’ll tell him of this cruelty and then

3) Have no time now. To make a long story short, in the midst of all of this chaos I think I might be in love. With—well—with Galinda’s boyfriend, Fiyero. And really, all I can say is “why me?” He’s definitely not as shallow or stupid as he pretends to be, but he’d be nuts to choose me over Galinda. My self esteem is not that low, it’s just, well, how do you compete with Little Miss Perfection herself?

More later (I promise),
Elphaba

[stars in the sky]

You'd better have more-- I need my Fiyeraba doseage!

Good stuff! Short, sweet, and effective (Maybe go into detail later about the trouble they got in? There's a good time lapse between INTG and OSG you can really run with!)

[imperfectly_green]

Oh, yes. I'm planning on taking some liberties with the time lapse between OSD and INTG. Darn Ozian post office can be so slow at getting letters to the Emerald City...

Aah, Fiyeraba. Well, you're not the only one who needs that daily dosage of Fiyeraba. I just wanted to get something out since I'll be leaving soon.